It’s obvious that you’re alone when you are the only one in the house – unless you have some spooky things going on…just sayin’. You also may feel alone when you start a new job or school and nobody knows your name. But what about when a lot of people do know your name, or if you are in a room full of people? Can you still feel alone? Absolutely!
Listen, there have been times when I felt like no one could possibly understand what I was feeling. It was almost like a wave of sadness came over me and I didn’t know what to do with it, or how to get through it. In times like these, we have to decipher what is really being revealed to us. Our mind likes to play tricks on us sometimes. We often believe that no one cares or that no one can relate. We are shown these false images of people but have no idea what they are battling on the inside. I used to be guilty of this myself, which is why I try to be so transparent at this point of my life. I know that there is someone that needs to know that everything isn’t always good. GOD IS! But our situations are sometimes just….bad! We don’t like to talk about those times because we want people to think of us in a certain way. I get it! Trust me…
I used to feel weak and way too vulnerable when there were moments of doubt or uncertainty. Rather then talk about them, I would just keep plugging along until it hopefully fixed itself or caused me to distance myself from certain people. I know now that it wasn’t the best method to deal with my issues or challenges, but I’m a work in progress. I still find myself pulling away from people when I don’t believe that my presence will make a difference one way or another. In those moments, I have talked myself out of feeling needed, wanted or even loved.
I remember being a teenager – in a bit of an awkward stage (yeah, I can admit it). I used to be my sister’s plus one any time she had plans to hang out with her friends. Lucky her…lol. It got to a point where she would get out to go inside someone’s house and I would opt to stay in the car. Of course, at that time, she wasn’t necessarily coaxing me to join her. She probably didn’t think much of it because at that time in our lives we weren’t nearly as close as we are now. She had the attention of boys, lots of friends and invitations to events and she is just so stinkin’ cute! I, on the other hand, was a bit of a tomboy with big glasses and, admittedly a little mean and rough around the edges. That is the time that I began to write poetry because I didn’t know what else to so with what I was feeling inside. That was one of the BEST things I could have done….
So, let’s talk about what is revealed in our alone time…
Everybody is not going to be your cheerleader. Nope. Just get that out of your head right now. If you are looking to be pumped up and celebrated every time you accomplish something you are going to be disappointed a lot. Sure, you will get the initial “Congratulations!” or “Good job!” But then…it might get radio silent and you may begin to feel alone and unsupported. Some of your biggest supporters will be people you don’t even know. Ask me how I know! My advice: don’t stop doing what you’re doing! You are going to touch the people that need to be touched. Those that want to hear about what you’re doing will find you.
You need an outlet. In my case, I am blessed to have my husband and my sister to talk to when I’m in my feelings. I also have my poetry…I LOVE to write and that is the best way I know to express what I’m feeling. This blog has become extremely therapeutic as well, which is why I had to stop worrying about who subscribed, who didn’t, who left a comment…it is helping ME! My prayer is that it is helping others as well. Some people find an empty studio and just dance, others paint…whatever you can do to release…do it! Talking to a neutral party is encouraged because it is always good to just say things out loud sometimes.
You are being prepared for something bigger. Often times, when you are feeling alone it is God’s way of preparing you for what else is in store. You can’t always be around the same people, same drama, same location and then expect different outcomes. That alone time is a good opportunity for you to really take inventory of who you allow in your space. People are often held back just because they don’t want to offend anyone or they’re worried about what someone may say…at some point, you have to decide that those thoughts will not determine your next move.
Alright, I’ve kept you long enough…I just really wanted to share this with you. It’s okay to talk about these feelings. Doing so can create a support system that you may not have. More people than you think feel this way in normal, everyday life. I am genuinely grateful for any and every one who has shown their support in some form or fashion throughout my entire life. It is the fuel that keeps me pushing…I do know now that I am not alone. It just took me a while to get here….
How do you cope in those moments when you feel alone? Share below in the comments!